Being broke is no joke

Unemployed for the past year, my savings are gone. I’ve moved back in with my mother. I am living on $44 a week on unemployment, which has been shut off for two weeks until my federal emergency unemployment comes through. It could be a month or two before it starts again. Unemployment, which I have paid into since I started working at 15 years old, is my only source of income.

I live on food stamps. Two hundred dollars a month is my saving grace – along with food baskets from the Salvation Army every three months. It’s illegal, but last week I had to sell $40 worth of food stamp groceries for cash in order to get gas for my car.

Being unemployed is boring. After you apply at every restaurant, shop and business within a 30 mile radius you reapply again.  

I believe my age (50ish) is playing some part in the neglect my full resume garners so far. I’ve redone my resume so many times so it adheres to the job requirements, and even that specialization has not helped a bit. Not a nibble. Not one call.

I volunteered for a while – to network, connect with my community, and help out others less fortunate – but without gas I can’t even do that anymore.

Before I was unemployed, I would frequently take weekend road trips all over the state but being broke stopped the trips and many other things you think you can’t live without, until you do have to live without.  

I shaved my head and am saving on haircuts this year. While I have never indulged in a manicure, now it is getting rough to do it myself because I can’t afford luxuries such as polish remover, et al.

Even eating out would be a thrill. Getting out of the house to have someone else cook a great meal for you – wow! What a concept. (First thing I will do when I get a paycheck.)

People judge you on what you do, and when you do nothing, some people make you feel like nothing. Being broke is a humiliating, humbling, numbing, and horrible existence.

It sucks to date

Being 50ish means to a lot of Baby Boomers my age they have to step back into the dating arena if they want to get laid or have any chance of a later-age romance.  The pull to be part of a relationship again is far too strong for some and is dormant in others. But as we age, we start thinking of what out later years will be like, especially if we are alone.

We want to have companionship but the road to finding a suitable significant other is fraught with a lot of those frogs we have to kiss until we find our prince. Online dating is the new ‘bar scene.’

While l exchange a (tame) photo with my potential online suitors, I save the personal information for someone who may be more than one-time date.  I don’t swap phone numbers, text, and tweet or engage in much small-talk or long discussions for that matter.  Until I meet the person will I decide how much I want to divulge about me, personally.

So, getting to that first date is a somewhat simple matter.  We arrange a meeting in a public place. I first ask to see their ID/drivers’ license to ensure he is who he said he was; and the date is off and running.

For me, I usually know within the first 15 minutes on whether the date is suitable for me.  If we met for coffee or a drink, I can get out after that first or second cup without much damage done if the suitor is not my cup of tea, pun intended.

However, if we click, we can continue to dinner or a club to watch live local music. (There is nothing like live local music! Better to attend with someone, too.)

I had such a date last night. While the date was very nice, handsome and employed (always a bonus), he seemed better suited for a girlfriend of mine. She happened to be performing in a club in town. With him in tow, we saw her show, and they exchanged numbers. 

I am turning into a serial dater but until I do find that someone for me, it does suck to be dating. In my smallish-town, the men my age look much older than I do; and the younger ones are usually too young for me. If he doesn’t know who Red Skelton is, he is too young for me. It is curious how fast that comedian can change a romance.

It's About Time

Finally, after promises and ‘evolving,’ President Barack Obama announced his support for same sex marriage; although he did not go as far as declare a national referendum on the matter.

It’s about time.

We are a nation of hypocrites. We claim to believe everyone is equal but we still have yet to pass an Equal Rights Amendment after nearly 40 years of coming up to vote – year after year.

Now, the time has come – forced by the Vice President Joe Biden announcing his support of same sex marriage on “ Meet the Press” over the past weekend. I watched the show and didn’t feel like it would create the outcry it has – especially by Gay Republicans who are pissed it took President Obama so long.

With this being an election year, the matter wasn’t supposed to be discussed until closer to November, but Biden pushed the issue to the forefront. Good for him, too. Not like a lot of white men lawmakers are jumping on the boat, but the national secretary of education also came out in favor later on last Sunday.

So, the issue is out there. It is only fair.  The Civil Rights Act of 1964 made racial discrimination illegal. It should have been updated years ago to firmly spell out that any discrimination against any other human is illegal.

However, there is still some question about how the nation’s highest court would rule on the issue. The last time the Supreme Court considered anything close was in 2003, when it ruled 5-4, to overrule an earlier decision regulating private sexual conduct for consenting adults. As he dissented, Justice Anthony Scalia, reportedly, said they were “largely signing on to the so-called homosexual agenda."

Isn’t about time we ensure everyone in America is treated equally?